雅思G類大作文寫作批改
2024-07-12 10:33:42 來源:中國教育在線
雅思G類大作文寫作批改,很多同學對于這個問題有疑問和不解,那么下面就跟著中國教育在線的小編詳細了解一下吧。
Some people prefer to relax by doing physical activities, while others choose mental activities (crosswords, chess etc.). Discuss the both views and give your opinion.
本期,組長搬運eltecenglish類似題目范文批改過來,供大家積累ideas、examples和vocabulary。需要注意的是,上題mental activities后面括號里列舉了cross words, chess,在寫作中要注意呼應這一細節(jié)。用腦力活動來放松對一些人來說是好的,因為他們可以通過專注做某事而處于心流狀態(tài)(mental flow),從而感到開心和放松。
題目:Some people think that rest and sleep are the best methods to relax while others think that it can be done by involving in some activities like sports. Do you agree or disagree and give your view?
標記含義:括號內是需要修改的;?
In todays (fast paced )fast-paced world, people are under tremendous stress and relaxation plays an important role in total well-being of an individual. Many argue that sleeping and resting are the best ways to relax since (it rejuvenates)they rejuvinate our mind and( improves) improve physical and mental health whereas, others argue that getting involved in sports is a better way to de-stress as it not only improves (your)fitness but also (make you) makes a person feel more (happier) happy (more和happier是表達重復) and relaxed. In my opinion, a balance between sleep and sport activities (are) is needed to maintain a sound mind and body.
譯文:現在生活節(jié)奏快,人們壓力很大,放松對個人健康很重要。很多人認為睡眠和休息是最佳休息方式,因為它們會讓我們煥發(fā)活力,改善我們的體能和心理健康,但其他人認為參加體育鍛煉時更好的減壓方式,因為它既塑形又讓人感覺開心和放松。我認為,人們需要平衡睡眠和體育活動來保持穩(wěn)定的身心狀態(tài)。
組長解析:這個開頭段比較長,可以寫得更簡單,如:People have different preferences when it comes to the way of relaxation. In my opinion...
Undoubtedly, to deal with increasing stress, it is utmost important (詞性錯誤,utmost 和important都是形容詞,正確的搭配是utmost importance)to repose or take a nap. After a long tiresome day at a workplace, an individual (might) may not be in a state of doing anything and our his body and mind (demands) demand rest. (After resting adequately or) Sleeping for six to seven hours a day helps an individual to recharge for the next day and refreshes mind and repairs body. Moreover, ample sleep is essential for learning and for effective cognitive processes. For example, a study done by a Harvard Psychologist in 2015 revealed that (40%) percent of people who were diagnosed with depression or anxiety were (more) likely to sleep less than five hours a day and around 28 percent (were having) had (suffered from) (時態(tài)錯誤) cognitive impairment.
譯文:毫無疑問,要應對不斷增加的壓力,休息或小睡是重要的。經過一整天的工作之后,一個人可能不想動,身心都需要休息。睡6-7個小時后就可以恢復精力和體力。此外,充足的睡眠對學習和有效的認知過程至關重要。例如,哈佛大學心理學家在2015年所做的一項研究表明,在抑郁癥和焦慮癥患者中,40%的人每天睡眠時間少于5小時,28%的人有過認知障礙。
組長解析:這段的論述不夠完整,例子與分論點的關系不緊密。恰當的寫法是:此外,充足的睡眠對學習和有效的認知過程至關重要。哈佛大學的研究表明,睡眠少于5小時的成年人患認知障礙的概率要比普通人高40%,同時,睡眠少于同齡人的中小學生的學習表現相對不好。
On the other hand, engaging in various sports activities will also help as to keep relaxed and fit. Whether you are playing sports, working out at a gym, or taking a brisk walk, physical activity triggers brain chemicals that make you feel happier and relaxed. In particular, team sports provide a chance to unwind and engage in a challenge that improves fitness and offers social (benefit) benefits such as connecting with team mates and friends, and (it even improves) they even improve concentration. For instance, a study done by an International Sport Scientist revealed that engaging in sports or exercises reduces the level of stress hormones in the body and it stimulates production of endorphins, which are natural mood lifters that can keep stress and depression at bay.
譯文:另一方面,參加各種體育活動也將有助于保持放松和健康。無論是從事體育運動,在健身房鍛煉身體還是快步走,體育鍛煉都會促進讓人快樂和放松的激素分泌。團隊運動尤其可以讓人放松,參與挑戰(zhàn)可以提高身體素質并與隊友和朋友建立聯系,甚至可以提高專注力。例如,國際體育科學家所做的一項研究表明,從事運動或鍛煉可降低體內壓力激素的水平,并刺激內啡肽的產生,內啡肽是天然的情緒提升劑,可抵御壓力和抑郁的侵襲。
To conclude, to cope up with the day to day (it even improves) work-related pressures and stress from society, a sufficient amount of rest and sleep is mandatory (inevitable). However, sports also play a great role in controlling stress and can uplift (ones) ones mood, so a healthy balance between sleep and sports activities are extremely important for a healthy mind and body.
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