雅思滿分作文評(píng)析
2024-08-09 13:54:32 來(lái)源:中國(guó)教育在線
雅思托福考試是全球最廣泛使用的英語(yǔ)語(yǔ)言考試之一,被許多國(guó)家的大學(xué)、移民機(jī)構(gòu)、企業(yè)和政府部門用作衡量語(yǔ)言能力的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)??忌枰诼牎⒄f(shuō)、讀、寫四個(gè)方面進(jìn)行測(cè)試,其中有不少同學(xué)想要了解:雅思滿分作文評(píng)析,那么下面中國(guó)教育在線小編就來(lái)和大家分享一番。
題目:As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.
What factors contribute to job satisfaction?
How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
范文:Nowadays many adults have full-time jobs and the proportion of their lives spent doing such jobs is very high. So feelings about ones job must reflect how an individual feels about his or her life as a whole, and because of this, job satisfaction is indeed very important for the wellbeing of that person.
Employees get job satisfaction in a number of ways. Firstly, a person needs to feel that they are doing valued and valuable work, so positive feedback from superiors is very important in this respect. A sense of fulfillment is also encouraged if a worker feels the job is worth doing because it contributes to the society or the economy as a whole. Secondly, when someone feels they are improving or developing their skills through training opportunities, for example, then there is a sense of progression and purpose that rewards a worker. The sense of belonging to a team or a working community also contributes to job satisfaction because colleagues help each other to enjoy their working lives. Satisfaction is also increased by a sense of responsibility for and loyalty to a team.
Of course not everyone enjoys their work. Hard economic realities mean that many people have little choice in the kind of job they can get. In some cases an employee is working in a job that suits neither their skills nor their personality. Some jobs are repetitive and boring, and labour relations may be poor and lead to resentment and insecurity rather than to job satisfaction.
However, even though it is unlikely that all workers do feel happy in their work, I think it is not unrealistic to promote more job satisfaction in any job. If the factors identified above are implemented, then any job can be improved and more workers can feel greater degrees of job satisfaction.
范文分析:
1、思路
本文的第一段復(fù)述了文章的主題(job satisfaction)
第2段回答了第一個(gè)問(wèn)題(What factors contribute to job satisfaction?)
第3段回答了第二個(gè)問(wèn)題(How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?)
第4段是第3段的補(bǔ)充
第一段主題句So feelings about ones job must reflect how an individual feels about his or her life as a whole, and because of this, job satisfaction is indeed very important for the wellbeing of that person.
第二段主題句Employees get job satisfaction in a number of ways.
第三段主題句Of course not everyone enjoys their work.
第四段主題句However, even though it is unlikely that all workers do feel happy in their work, I think it is not unrealistic to promote more job satisfaction in any job.
2、結(jié)構(gòu)
一般說(shuō)來(lái),在段落之間,沒有特別的連接詞,暗指后面一段在支持前面一段的主題句。
段落之間的關(guān)聯(lián)詞:
在第3段的段首,考官使用Of course, 表示切換話題。這個(gè)詞可以理解為然而。
在第4段的段首,考官使用了However, 展示本段是上一段的轉(zhuǎn)折,即論證的補(bǔ)充。這個(gè)詞組可以理解為盡管如此
一般說(shuō)來(lái),在一個(gè)段落內(nèi)的句子之間,沒有特別的連接詞,暗指后面一句在支持主題句。
段落中的路標(biāo)詞:在第1段中,考官使用了So來(lái)突出主題句。這個(gè)詞可以理解為總之。
3、語(yǔ)法
這篇考官范文在句式上最經(jīng)典之處就是充分利用了英文的狀語(yǔ)從句,幾乎所有的狀語(yǔ)從句在這篇文章中都很好地體現(xiàn)出來(lái)了。
全文使用的長(zhǎng)難句型如下:
If, then(條件狀語(yǔ))
because(原因狀語(yǔ))
ifbecause .(條件狀語(yǔ) + 原因狀語(yǔ))
When,then(時(shí)間狀語(yǔ))
, so (結(jié)果狀語(yǔ))
Even though, (讓步狀語(yǔ))
I think it is not unrealistic to(我覺得這件事并非不真實(shí)雙重否定表示肯定)
, and (并列句)
neithernor (否定并列句)
4、詞匯
a、必備詞匯:(掌握核心動(dòng)詞)注明:()里的數(shù)字代表這個(gè)詞在文章中出現(xiàn)的次數(shù),因此在文章中使用同一個(gè)詞,只要把握好度,并不會(huì)帶來(lái)太大的影響。其他沒有標(biāo)注()的詞在原文中只出現(xiàn)過(guò)一次。
這次feel這個(gè)單詞創(chuàng)紀(jì)錄地使用了5次,另一個(gè)improve也使用了2次。這再一次告訴我們,考官也偶爾會(huì)用重復(fù)的詞,只是數(shù)量不要太多了。
Feel (5), improve(2), spend doing, reflect, contribute to(這個(gè)在之前的范文中,考官使用的是make contribution to), belong to, reward, help, increase, identify, implement, enjoy, mean, suit, lead to
b、亮點(diǎn)詞匯:
A sense of fulfillment充實(shí)感, a sense of progression進(jìn)步感, a sense of responsibility and loyalty責(zé)任感和忠誠(chéng)感, valued and valuable本身很有價(jià)值和能夠創(chuàng)造價(jià)值的, positive積極的, repetitive重復(fù)的, resentment不滿, insecurity不安全感, superior上級(jí)、高手
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